Words of Condolence to help someone who lost someone


What is the right thing to say when someone is in pain? How do we comfort a grieving person? What words can we offer that might ease our friend’s or family member’s burden, if only for a moment? Or perhaps no words will ever suffice. Either way, what you say after a loved one dies can make all the difference in how someone deals with their grief and loss.

How would you react if someone close to you died?

Your loved one is gone. It’s never easy to know what to say in the face of death, but it really helps to be there. Try offering comfort and support through your actions over words. If you don’t know what to do or say, just sit with them in silence.

Sometimes, this simple act can mean more than any words ever could. Saying nothing at all is sometimes the most comforting thing you can offer someone who has lost a loved one.

You can acknowledge the situation and express your concern by saying the following:

  • I’m so sorry you’re going through this.” “I don’t know what to say, but I want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.”
  • Sometimes, the best thing is also the simplest. You can let them talk or not talk as they need. Have some tissues ready if they start to cry. Or just hold their hand.

What not to say to someone who lost someone

I know how you feel

If no one can ever truly understand what someone else is going through, this statement will only make them feel more alone. It’s important to remember that everyone experiences loss differently. Some people might be comforted by knowing you went through something similar or by sharing your own story, but others may find it unhelpful. When talking about loss, avoid making comparisons and try to honor the person’s unique experience by listening attentively rather than trying to relate.

It’s part of God’s plan

This may be true, but the person who has lost a loved one is still in pain. Even if it feels like their loss was easier because someone died without prolonged illness or pain, such comments can come across as dismissive and hurtful.

Everything happens for a reason

People of different faiths handle death differently, and talking about God—even in positive ways—can make people feel alienated from you and your perspective on life. Instead try saying something that leaves room for a range of religious beliefs including none at all. For example, an appropriate comment might be: “I don’t know why bad things happen, but I believe that love is a powerful thing.”

At least they’re no longer suffering

A grieving person doesn’t want to be strong right now. Saying this implies that they should put their own feelings aside and take care of others, which might not even be possible. What they need from you is love and support. You can offer them these things without placing expectations on them.

God wanted another angel in heaven

When someone close to you experiences the loss of a loved one, it’s difficult to find the right words to comfort them. But what might be even more helpful than saying anything at all is showing your support through your actions.

You can also console your loved one by motivational words

  • Be patient with them and let them do things at their own pace.
  • They might not want company right away or they may want an hour alone followed by constant companionship.
  • Respect whatever boundaries they set for themselves, but also offer help when needed.
  • Don’t expect that they will always know what they need or how to ask for it; this isn’t easy stuff, so just check in regularly by asking if there’s anything else they need or if there’s anything you can do.
  • Respect their religious and cultural traditions, if they want to observe them.
  • If you don’t know how to help with specific rituals, ask about traditions of the person who passed away instead of making assumptions.
  • Some ways you might offer support include: offering meals for grieving families; preparing a room for visiting guests; or hosting visitors in your home when that seems more inviting then going out.
  • Let them talk about their loved one when they are ready.
  • They don’t have to feel obligated to share all their feelings right away—and they probably won’t be able to anyway.
  • When people are mourning it’s often hard just getting through every day without feeling upset, so don’t push them to discuss what’s hurting them if they aren’t ready.
  • Lend an ear if the person wants to talk.
  • Sometimes just listening to someone who is grieving can help them feel less alone and more understood.
  • If you don’t know what to say, try openly sharing your own feelings about the loss rather than trying to imagine how someone else feels.
  • Offer practical help like cooking, dropping off groceries, or making phone calls for them—whatever it is that you think might make their lives a little bit easier right now.
  • You’d be amazed at how often people tell us that these kinds of offers are some of the most helpful things during times of grief because they relieve mental burdens like worrying about household chores or deadlines.
  • Finally, don’t forget to take care of yourself during this time.
  • This can be a difficult and emotional time for everyone and you might find it’s good to talk about your own feelings with someone else who is close to the person who has died.
  • We all have things we want to say in times of loss, but often it feels like there are no words that will help ease the pain and grief of losing someone close enough too.

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